Ending week 4
An interesting thing happened yesterday. After 3 weeks of eating well and feeling for the most part satisfied…….I had a meltdown. I felt fat, ugly, disappointed and just pissed off. My first thought and my second thought, was that all this healthy eating was for nothing. I mean shouldn’t I have some pay off for not eating crappy food? Why don’t I feel fit and happy? I wanted to go mow down as much starchy, sweet things as I could just to prove something.
My husband picked up on my mood and asked me what was wrong. Boy did he get an ear full. Bless his heart. He listen to me bitch and complain and then he said, “Lori, It‘s not like your overweight, you have always kept your weight in check. You know how to eat and you have taught me so much about nutrition, listening to your body and feeding it real food. This is what happens to you when you don’t allow yourself to eat something that is good for you and works for you. You get angry.”
He was right and he was being my voice of reason. I couldn’t hear my own truth because of all the expectations, judgments and critical self talk that had taken over my mind and then my emotions.
I know for a fact that all women go through this. We put ourselves on a plan with a certain expectation and when our bodies don’t cooperate we think all our effort was a waste of time. It’s not. Every time we choose to eat healthy foods we win.
So, what happened to me? On Tuesday I felt great, on Wednesday the meltdown. It’s two things. One, I think I am a little hormonal and two, and the most likely, I realized I had given my power away to “the plan”.
I have a BIG problem with “don’t tell me what I can and can’t eat” when it’s happening inside my head. So yesterday I wanted a sandwich. I told myself I couldn’t because bread wasn’t on the plan. (even though, my commitment to the plan ended on Monday, I was still following it.) So I could have had a sandwich but I was telling myself “NO”, that’s what set me off.
Once my husband reminded me that I could eat a sandwich if I wanted, I felt better.
I realize this is kind of a crazy story but we women, our bodies and the things we say to ourselves, is crazy.
So, I leave you with this. You always have a choice. When you make that choice does it feel good and support your vision or does it feel bad and go against your vision. Make your choices consciously because your emotional attitude about it is an important key.
FYI, healthy eating support and accountability class coming in March.